Smoothing the Hurt, Feeling All of It

Solace in creation

When the world is upside down and feels underwater

I turn to creating;

baking

sewing

dyeing

sorting colors

clean spaces in the studio

pulling beads out of drawers and hanging the strands on the walls

cutting

tearing

pressing leather into shapes

spending time at the lapidary wheels, communing with stones

tea

ink to paper

watercolors rinsed from brushes

steam curls from the bath

tears down cheeks

oil blends that comfort

There is more, this list could be endless, it is endless, this is but a snippet of soul-soothing. My friends are here, too. The ones that know the hurt deeply themselves. The ones who might not understand, but see it and smooth out the ruffled fur and feathers of my heart. I love you all, you know. Deeply, closely and from far away. I need you just the same, and more every day. Love is the answer, love is the question, love is the path I know and choose in little and large ways. The duality of pain and love takes my breath away, I am learning to live with the sharper edges of love.

When I find a blue feather, lost tobacco, pieces of stone and wood, know that I remember you, you far away souls. I miss you and I love you, my dear ones.

{for my Kellys, especially}
blue feather